It has been my privilege to be friends with “Friends in Grief”, for 23 years.  This is half of my life.  We met in 1987 when I saw a story in the newspaper about the organization.  I had suffered a terrible loss the year before, and I was an apprentice funeral director.   I knew I had to connect but I wasn’t quite sure how.  Feeling very unsure of myself and feeling just plain nervous,   I called Joan Faria.   I was just 22 years old, and I was young, wounded and raw.  Joan was very warm and kind.  She took me under her wing, and I began the personal journey of healing.  I also learned about ministering and caring for those who grieve.  Under Joan’s leadership and guidance, I learned the art and value of listening and witnessing another’s pain.  My personal healing journey was rich.  My passion took root, and the foundations for my professional life were laid.

When I became engaged a while later, the wonderful women of Friends In Grief gave me my 1^st bridal shower.  It was to be a surprise.  I thought we were gathering for a bbq and I asked Marie Micor what I could bring.  I showed up at her door with a jar of olives…for my own shower!  We all had a wonderful laugh together.  It was lovely.  One lady, Jean, had hand painted a small beautiful water colour for me as a gift.   What a wonderful metaphor this shower was:  these women were helping me to launch myself in more ways than one, and were showering me with tlc, as they had for my grief journey.

Our friendship continued as I married and became a licensed Funeral Director.   I met the vivacious Margo Wotta.  Margo engaged people and somehow my husband, Stephen ended up making the portable F.I.G. tree.  My mom’s senior ladies tap group got involved too, as the entertainment for a fundraising bazaar.  The friendship spread to my family!

I crossed paths with Steve and Barb Pustai, at Friends In Grief, at the time Stephen I and were expecting our 1^st child, Erzsebet.  Steve and Barb lost their son, and  are part of my husband’s Hungarian family.  That personal family link, thru F.I.G illustrates how life and death co-exist, and we are all connected.

Friends in Grief has helped many people since 1985.  I would like to remind us here today of their mission, which is right on their website:

Friends In Grief seeks to provide opportunities for the bereaved to share their experiences, and to receive support, understanding, and compassion from others who are also bereaved by;

• Reaching out to all bereaved individuals regardless of cultural and ethnic origin and religious affiliation.
• Acknowledging individual beliefs and values
• Recognizing that grief is unique and personal and should not be judged.
• Respecting the bereaved and their need for confidentiality
• Providing education to the public and to professionals on the many aspects of bereavement and grief.

 

Friends In Grief is a valuable and integral part of our community.  F.I.G. keeps moving along, with the help of Bev Wilson, Ellie Deveau, and countless dedicated individuals.  With the newest addition to the FIG family, Rose MacDonald, this organization will continue its dedicated service of support.  This is sooooo good to know, that Friends In Grief is here embracing us, as we come together today, in our grief in pain.

Grieving your loss will be one of the hardest things you will ever do.  I can’t sugarcoat that.  Own your grief, and don’t let anyone take it away from you.  Let Friends In Grief surround you with their special brand of TLC, as I let them 23 years ago.

You WILL find hope again.  Hope is the very atmosphere that Friends In Grief creates.  Breathe it in, like an elixir, and one day, your face will turn to the sun again.

Thank you Friends In Grief for everything.